Filed under Classifieds

GUNS don’t kill people!!! Slimey slugs who have them do though!!!

B.F.L. Bugs for life Danny W. Shultz

WHEN old wormy’s son stopped to pick him up after work the other morning the pudgie jowled old grub complimented him on his challenged, blood snotted, alle*geriatric eyes. He said he had been out drinking the night before with his potty challenged enuresis buddies. That’s when old Wormy said I’ll do the driving home fuzz ball.

The imago chrysalis Danny W. Shultz

YOU steam broiled city lobster baits won’t have anything over us anymore.

Seven years ago we only had a little worm who had a pan fish fry at his house. But now!!! We have a Pu Pae son of a superior helgramite who had a peanut buttered golden trout lake for his whole downtown.

The butter flying BUG Danny W. Shultz

DRUNKS Beware! This ad is protected by a vicious biting flea.

The BUG who warned you Danny W. Shultz

CHECK out Teenie Weenie’s sniveling lice report at your local lousy news station for an update on the state beer, wine, & liquor drug tax controversy in your nearest high class micro louse joint.

the MACRO tax your drug BUG Danny W. Shultz

A $34 bottle of wine in California & New York costs $55 in PA. If $6.12 goes to the state 18% liquor drug tax who gets the fruit fly suckers other $14.88 high class stink joint? The blossoming BUG Danny W. Shultz.

THE next time you order a 54 dollar bottle of wine at a stink joint ask for a fruit fly bottle to take the left over home with you. Or does your research scientist recommend you drink the whole quart at one sitting. The next time BUG Danny W. Shultz

FOR most people lying about alcohol is like lying on their taxes. For them everyone does it. The BUG who doesn’t Danny W. Shultz

CAN I tell the WOO*C*ING fruit fly about the P.S. you left out of my mini biography to the editor? People who smoke, drink, or use drugs are all a bunch of dysfunctional social WOO*C*IES.

The blotched out BUG Danny W. Shultz

WE all know that smoking is bad for us. We also know what junk food & booze does to people. So from now on all of you should be required to go outside to eat & drink so we don’t have to smell the toxic gas you all make.

The poisoned BUG Danny W. Shultz

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